AGJM Posted January 29, 2013 Share Posted January 29, 2013 My dogs are dying - my pets that have been a sort of "constant" since I was 2. My new church is an extreme downgrade from the old one - and the only times I'm there anymore are Sundays (unlike my old church) and on those Sundays, I'm either in the tech booth or in my dad's office - the sermons rarely have a point or make me feel better about my faith, and the Sunday school for Highschool is unreasonably childish (singing "Father Abraham had Many Sons" [or whatever the proper title is] and "Deep and Wide" is not my idea of praise music) and lacks in any sort of constructive discussion. My school work is unreasonable - I have geometry homework tonight on things that weren't taught that my sister - who is in Pre- Calculus - cannot help me with, and I had a dissection to do in biology that I had virtually no instructions on (as I was absent yesterday, when he gave instructions, and my partner, who is from South Korea, didn't understand what was being said, as he only came here over Christmas break) and my teacher, when I asked for further explanation, said that his little re-cap ("Do what I told you to do yesterday, get the pieces off the external body and put them on a sheet of paper and label them, then do the rest of the dissection and the report") should have been enough. It's not, when I wasn't even aware we were doing a dissection. I can't sleep at night, even when I take Melatonin - it's why I had to stay home on Monday. My parents are always telling me that I need to do "fun" stuff that I don't want to do, such as Boy Scouts (I've tried it twice before and hated it both times) or random adventurous whims they have - probably because there's nothing in my free time to do that doesn't involve a computer. I have a TV, a laptop, and an Xbox 360 - then there is outside, which isn't exactly great with no friends around, then there's the fact that no one else my age, that I know of, seems to live in my neighborhood, and the fact that there is no beach, no pond, no woods to go in... The only variety in my life is what sort of inconveniences I'll experience throughout a given day. And, when I come home, I either won't have time to unwind doing anything (all of the homework that I have to go and figure out on my own, or my mom trying to get me to do something stupid) or I'll try to unwind on a video game, and be too wound up to get past all of the glitches or stupid people or whatever and end up angrier than before. I'm getting tired of life. And now I have to go spend a few hours trying to figure out what I need to do for my dissection report. I literally, seriously, in all fairness, didn't get a single word of instruction for what I needed to do other than being told that I should have listened to him (while I wasn't at school). I really want to punch something - even a pillow - but someone will hear, and I'll be in trouble for being human and having emotions. Screw this. Quote The hardest part of ending is starting again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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