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How do you perceive life in general?

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I've started having issues with anxiety recently.

Interestingly, I'm more of an extrovert these days, and my anxiety blooms mostly when I'm left alone with my mind (and by that I don't mean that my mind and "I" are separate, just a figure of speech). The thoughts are ridiculous; solipsism and reality-related fears ("what if this is all an elaborate scientific experiment conducted to study me?" etc. I should note that I don't believe in these ideas, they just torment me), but for some reason they spiral out of control.

This change has influenced the way I see life. I used to live in the moment, I was known as the guy who was zen and never worried about anything and simply floated through life towards Nirvana. But now, even though I do yoga, I exercise, eat right, enjoy school and try to give myself time for relaxation, I still can't get back into that peaceful mindset. Only when I'm with my friends or family do I feel like everything's fine and that I'm safe. For now, I'm trying to not try too hard to relax (wow, could that sentence get more baffling?), I'm trying to survive this phase of my life, one hour, one day, one month at a time.

Nights are the worst, that's when most of my panicking occurs.

Edited by Kemaru

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I'd be more worried if it was the other way around. Anxiety & panic attacks are really scary as you know. I suggest talking to a counsellor if you have access to one. Seems to me you already have the solution. Keep at it & take heart that your feelings are quite normal for many & is a transient phase. 

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Life is too short to be spent worrying about garbage that is out of our control to the point of anxiety and panic. Live your life for yourself while being kind and thoughtful to others. Impress yourself first and don't worry about what others think. It is much easier and better for your sanity to make yourself happy than it is to make others happy. If you go through life living this way at the end you should feel good about your life and the fear of death will be gone. Death should not be feared but seen as a conclusion to a full life.

Edited by skullbonz
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 Death should not be feared but seen as a conclusion to a full life.

 

Take this however you want ... but that's nonsense.  Tell that to a child or someone in their prime.  And what about the worry a dying person has for those they leave behind.  That's fear

 

Kemaru mate.  BBQ talks sense as the rep points show.  I was hospitalised once when a panic attack came from nowhere, my first ever one and I only went down street for milk.  I thought I was having a heart attack

 

CBT is a great tool, talk to someone if you can, and never think you're not 'normal' (it's over-rated anyways) for feeling like you do.

 

In fact it sounds a bit like depression too.  See your doc and don't be shy about saying how you feel.  

You're a level headed geezer and sometimes life isn't B & W ... the fact you've admitted how you feel here is a step in the right direction.  Good luck

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Take this however you want ... but that's nonsense.  Tell that to a child or someone in their prime.  And what about the worry a dying person has for those they leave behind.  That's fear

 

I think there is a fine line here.  To paraphrase Robbie Williams - I do not fear death, I just don't want to die just yet. I think this is a reasonably healthy state and I'm comfortable with it.

 

To actually FEAR death is (IMHO) quite a negative way to live, yet incredibly common (most religions are powered by this fear).

 

I, too, would have worries for those left behind.  And for things left unfinished and all those unsatisfied hopes, dreams and aspirations.  I think this is also normal and healthy and quite different from fearing death itself.

 

 

I don't want to die in pain. Who would?  I'm confident that I will die and that nature will prepare me for it in the preceding years, months, days and (possibly only) seconds.  Nature is good at this sort of stuff.

 

 

 

+1 Skullbonz and +1 Welshy.  I think you guys have made excellent points in the two preceding posts.

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EER: do only etherial beings have this ability to gain energy/power in this way?


lol bro, in my opinion, we are one in the same as astrals / etherials with the only difference being we have bodies and will someday make the same transition. We have the same abilities as they do but are limited to what our physical bodies can accomplish.


Kemaru:  I've started having issues with anxiety recently. Interestingly, I'm more of an extrovert these days, and my anxiety blooms mostly when I'm left alone with my mind (and by that I don't mean that my mind and "I" are separate, just a figure of speech). The thoughts are ridiculous; solipsism and reality-related fears ("what if this is all an elaborate scientific experiment conducted to study me?" etc. I should note that I don't believe in these ideas, they just torment me), but for some reason they spiral out of control.


No worries man, it is normal to have these types of thoughts known as "existential crisis". It's when we question life itself, it's purpose and values. I have this as well and is why my thought process works the way it does. I've come to the conclusion that seeking an answer to a question in which the question itself is undefinable (life), the answer would also be undefinable.

What helps is to keep this in mind, we live in a universe nearly 14 billion years old on a planet nearly 5 billion years old and in that time, we as humans only get to experience 100 of those years on average, to learn about the wonderous universe that surrounds us. With so much to learn and explore, but with so little time, you can't afford to waste even a moment of it.

Enjoying life for what it is and what it isn't, is the best way to look at it. :D If still feeling a little sad, I highly recommend Grand Theft Auto and some grenades as you can never go wrong with things that go BOOM. :D

 

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Of course none of us Want to die and we do our best to try not to.  I have just been diagnosed with a disease that will kill me within the next decade and it could happen anytime in that span depending on how I live. At 59 years old I feel I have lived a full life. I have been all over the place,seen all kinds of things,argued with many A holes,learned many things,held multiple licenses to perform complicated work and taught others the same,raised two kids on my own who now have 3 kids of their own,and done pretty much what makes me happy my whole life. My dad lived his life worrying about everything,even the things he had no control over.  He died from it before his time. At a young age I saw this as no way to go through life and did not want to end up like him so I lived my life for me and did not constantly worry about things beyond my control,like death. No one knows when exactly their time has come until the moment it happens. It is a waste of your life to go through it worrying about it. As for the fear of it,what is their to fear?  Fearing about people left behind is nonsense. We can't live forever as much as some think they can so live your life as full as you can and don't worry or fear the things beyond your control while you are living and you will be much happier and healthier.  I do not fear or worry about death,it will come when it comes and I will accept it willingly. I have already started the proceedings to secure and pay for my own funeral and burial plot so I do not leave my relatives with any burden. I also have left strict orders that there shall be a party for my death and none of the wimpering or crying allowed. I want people to think about the happy times,not the death.

 

What I say may be nonsense to some,but to me so is what they say. 

Edited by skullbonz

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Wow. That's a positive outlook. I salute you, Skully. To have this attitude in the face of your diagnosis/prognosis is inspiring.

I don't know when my time will come. Yet it will and will probably catch me by surprise when it does. I've already made some arrangements. A Will, and my own version of the 5 Wishes. Your party idea sounds brilliant. I might add that ;)

"No Fear" is a common car sticker around here. I'm taking that as my personal motto in this matter. A little preparation in advance but No Fear.

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I don't fear death. Death is absolute – once you're gone, all you had is behind you and the only thing ahead is either nothing or something beyond what we can perceive. So, there's no use fearing it.

That said, I definitely don't want to go before I've accomplished the things I've set my mind to. I want to be known. I want to leave a cultural legacy and to make a difference, I want to achieve greatness. I guess for me, life is all about the struggle between striving for brilliance and giving in to apathy. Thus far I'm happy that all my major life choices have steered me towards my goals, instead of away from it to mediocrity. I am a bit disappointed that I underachieved in my final exams even though they don't matter to me, but dwelling in the past is futile.

 

Thanks Barbieq for saying those kind things. :)

It's comforting to hear that I'm not the only one having those thoughts. Thanks RFX. :) Right now, I'm mainly trying to learn how to relax again. I have GTAIV on my laptop! I suppose I should give it a go then. I am easily upset though, I don't like violent games or films – for example, I can't watch Dexter anymore and I had to pause after 5 minutes of Hannibal.

Skullbonz and Welshblue, thank you for your words as well. Welshy, I think so too, normality is overrated. Talking about my feelings here already helps a bunch. The next step will be to talk about it with a friend of mine.

 

By the way, what first triggered my anxiety was a Dr. Who episode, the one with the library and the first encounter with River Song. It's a lot more deep-rooted than that of course but it amazes me how traumatic that reasonably light series can be. Now I'm off to prepare a cup of tea!

Edited by Kemaru

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Well, it is good to know that others think like me...

 

Daleks, when I was probably close to Kemaru's age, disturbed me to the point I could no longer watch Dr Who! They were so purely evil, or so was my experience at the time. I think young folk are exposed to & presented with ideas, occurrences & images that are much more complex & disturbing that are far being their years but on the whole seem to manage it.

 

Guys, being prepared is a good thing. I keep telling my family not to cry for me when I am gone but to remember the good times. You can only do that if you make memories NOW. Esp. my kids & siblings, I tell them to make memories with their Mum/Grandma because the chances are pretty high that very soon that is what you will be left with.   So long as there is someone to remember us, we live on in their memory.

 

All that said, I've lived long enough to have stared at death at least half a dozen times, even brought back once, I can tell you my thoughts were with the ones I was leaving behind. 

 

Kemaru, those feelings are valid & I wish more folk thought like this. There are enough apathetic people in this world. We need you.

 

Skullbonz - mate, I hope we have you around for a lot longer. Preparedness is a gift to those left behind. Hubby & I are in the process of that. While it doesn't dampen the grief (memories or not, since even Jesus cried when his friend Lazarus died & yet he knew he would bring him back to life), it eases the stress of dealing with the death of a loved one.

 

EER, "NO FEAR" indeed - just prepared...

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